https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d_NVSIqCROA
A few days ago I was feeling the worst I’d felt in probably an entire year. I’d isolated myself and destroyed the social momentum I’d acquired over the previous week, massively failed a challenge with my friend Huan, and repeatedly procrastinated my return to the community here. For a day or two I felt completely worthless.
Just as I was beginning to enter a period of self-loathing I had a friend invite me to a music festival. The next day a friend asked if I wanted to hang out at the fireworks.
Today Huan gave me a nod of encouragement, one of the readers here offered advice on what to do when I’ve got writer’s block, and my grandma even surprised me with lunch from Chipotle. How could I continue self-loathing when I’ve got love pouring in from all of you?
However, here’s the thing. None of these people owe me shit. I’m not entitled to free Chipotle merely because I exist. I’m not entitled to invitations to cool stuff just because.
No, no, no.
The reason I’m getting free Chipotle is because I keep my grandma company and help her with yard work. The reason Huan’s giving me encouragement is because I’ve linked to and critiqued his blog posts in the past. The reason my friend’s are inviting me to do cool shit, is because I’ve taken them on crazy adventures in the past.
It’s a mutually beneficial relationship. I help my crew when they’re down, and in return they do there best to support me when I’m struggling. You can’t just take from others. To receive you must first give, and that’s what I’d recommend to you.
When your social life is banging you might let it go to your head and think you’re above other people. I’m not proud to admit it, but I know I’ve fallen into that thought pattern before.
Try to rise above this inclination, however, and show love to everyone. If you’re nice to the weird kid everyone else bullies he might surprise you. Maybe he’ll teach you guitar. Maybe he’ll let you hang out at his family’s country club in the summer.
Maybe if you’re nice to the shy girl nobody else notices you’ll develop a close friendship and later be able to go to her for advice on anything.
You might not think much of someone now, but if you’re cool to them they may later prove to be the friend you need to get back on your feet after a setback. And truth be told, maybe they won’t be. But at least you’ll have put yourself in good standing with them and became a better person in the process.
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