Loving Work

When I was younger, I hated work.  It didn’t matter what kind of work it was, I always found a way to avoid doing anything that required a significant amount of effort.  On the rare occasions I did work I never did any more than the absolute minimum that was required of me.

This is how most people operate.  Most people see work as a dreaded necessity in their lives and will do almost anything to avoid it.  It’s been said that people are naturally lazy, but I don’t think that’s the problem.  The problem is most people don’t see why hard work is necessary.

When I first started lifting weights I found it very difficult, but I continued because I thought that eventually working out would become effortless.  As you might imagine, I was wrong.

As I became stronger, and began lifting more weights, working out actually became more difficult.  As I progressed to lifting more and more weight I began to realize the strongest guys in the gym weren’t the strongest because they had been lifting the longest.  They were the strongest because they were able to work through the most pain.  They were the ones willing to work the hardest.

Another interesting thing I noticed, was that although most people dreaded having to work out, the strongest guys actually looked forward to it, and many even considered it the best part of their day.  The strongest guys loved working out because they saw it as being necessary.  The strongest guys worked out because they knew it was the only way to reach their goals.

Seeing their perspective had a great impact on me and the way I thought about work.  Work was no longer something I had to do, but something I wanted to do.  It was still difficult, but it became something I enjoyed.

When I was in track in middle school, I ran the mile.  I set a new personal best every single meet my 8th grade year, and even though I was always exhausted at the end of my runs, I loved them.   The feeling of constant improvement was wonderfully fulfilling.

Over time I began to adopt the same mindset towards all the work in my life.  Lifting, and writing weren’t enjoyable at first, but I knew they had to get done to accomplish my goals.

I think the biggest breakthrough I had was that eventually hard work was no longer an annoying life requirement, but an exhilarating opportunity to improve myself, and progress toward my goals.

I began to love working.  Television, and other low level activities were no longer interesting to me because I knew they weren’t going to help me get to where I wanted to go.

I currently spend almost all of my time writing, making videos, or juggling (I’m looking into incorporating juggling into my motivational speeches).  Although most people think my life would be boring because I spend so much time working, that’s a matter of perspective.  I see their lives as being boring.

When I think of exciting activities the last thing that occurs to me is sitting on a couch in the living room staring at a box. The average American spends almost 5 hours per day watching television, and how any of them see it as anything more than a poor temporary escape from reality is beyond me.  Watching television is among the least intelligent ways you could spend your time.

Why would you ever want to escape from reality?  Your life is still going to suck when you turn the TV off.  Why not improve your reality instead?

It can be difficult to admit that you don’t like your current circumstances, but if you’ve neglected to put any hard work into your reality you can’t expect to get anything more than subpar results.

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Escaping From Reality

As a child, I remember always looking forward to the cartoon marathons on Saturday mornings.   No matter how bad my week had been, I knew that when Saturday morning came around I could escape.   On Saturday mornings I could get away from all the stress and problems from my life, if only for a few hours.

As I grew older I still watched television, but my primary escape from reality became video games.  It wasn’t unusual for me to play them for 8-10 hours a day, and when I got an iPod touch the problem only magnified.

At first I only downloaded a few simple games on my iPod.  Paper Toss, Doodle Jump, things like that.  But over time I began to download more time consuming games.

I can’t recall most of their specific titles, but I remember at one point I was actively playing 4-5 MMORPG’s (Massively multiplayer online role-playing game) and I was even the leader of the biggest clan on one of them.

I was addicted, spending all my waking hours playing them, and as sad as it sounds, sometimes I even lost sleep over them.

As I fell deeper into my addiction I saw my life spiral out of control.  I alienated the few friends I had, and I felt alone and unfulfilled.  I was tremendously focused on becoming the top player on those online games, but ultimately my focus amounted to nothing.  I was spinning my wheels, but I had nothing to show for it.

As I became more interested in my personal development I managed to quit television, and video games, but I never understood what caused those addictions in the first place.  And without that knowledge I would later try to escape reality through the internet, and other unhealthy releases.

Something I never understood was that neither television, nor video games were the problem.  They were merely symptoms, and as long as I tried to address the symptoms I was never going to solve the problem.  Even if I had some success in eliminating the symptoms from my life, as long as the problem remained I was going to continue to attract similar negative symptoms into my life.

The problem was never that I watched too much television, or played too many video games.  The problem was that I was too afraid to face the reality I had created for myself.  And the disgust I felt after this realization no longer made stagnation an option.

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Adjusting Your Runs

The key to offensive success in soccer is off-ball movement.  Making offensive runs off the ball is what opens up space to exploit the defense.  No team will ever be successful at a high level of soccer if the whole team just watches the player with the ball.

After a particularly rough game last season, our coach was talking to us in the locker room, and he asked why nobody was making any off ball movements.  We sat in silence.  He asked if it was because we didn’t know where to go.  Someone nodded their head.

After that our coach said something that really resonated with me.  He said, “Even if you don’t know where to make your runs, make them anyway. If you make the wrong runs we can correct them, but if you just stand there you’ll never learn anything.”

I don’t think he realized just how powerful those words were.  Our team began making lots of mistakes, but we quickly improved our off-ball movement, and we ended up finishing 2nd in our league.  More importantly it helped me develop a different mindset towards failure.

It made me realize that failure isn’t bad.  Making mistakes is ok as long as you learn from them.

Many foreign language learners try to become perfect at the language they’re learning before ever going out and speaking with native speakers.  Their ego is too concerned they’ll make mistakes.  And they probably will.  But in those mistakes lies the quickest road to improvement.  You can’t adjust your runs if you never make any.

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The First Step

“Ready, fire, aim is superior to ready, aim, aim, aim.”

~Steve Pavlina

When I first became interested in personal development I used to read personal development material for hours every single day.  I used to watch motivational video, after motivational motivational video.  I used to plan all the steps I needed to take to reach my goals.  But I never took action.

Too many people fall into the trap of reading article after article, book after book, podcast after podcast, without ever taking action.  It’s easy to spend your days consuming personal development material and believe you’re making progress toward your goals.  I’m here to tell you you’re not.

Nobody ever learned to ride a bike by reading a book.  Unapplied knowledge is next to useless.  It’s easy to sit on your computer and read articles because it’s “safe”.  But until you start taking action, however scary that may seem, you’re never going to accomplish anything.

Because you’re reading an article about taking action I’m going to assume you have some type of goal you want to achieve.  Maybe you want to lose weight or make more money.   It doesn’t matter what your goal is as long as it’s something you want and not a goal your family, friends, or society is pressuring you to accomplish.  Don’t read any further until you have a goal in mind.

Alright, now that you’ve got a goal I want you to think of one action you could take to bring yourself a step closer to your goal.  If you want to become a blogger register a domain.  If you want to become an author write the first page of your book.  If you want to start a band purchase an instrument.

Once you’ve thought of an action you could take… take it.  Even if it feels like in the grand scheme of things it’s not going to make a difference, take it.  Because Action Precedes Motivation it will motivate you to take further action.

After you’ve taken your first action take another step toward your goal the next day.  And the next day.  And everyday following that until you achieve your goal.

Don’t let this be just another forgotten article.  Take that first step.

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Action Precedes Motivation

Most people wait until they’re motivated to take action.  That’s why most people never end up taking action.

There’s a common misperception that you need to feel motivated to take action.  That’s wrong.  You’ll never amount to anything if that’s the mindset you adapt because action doesn’t follow motivation.  Motivation follows action.

If you’ve ever ran or lifted weights regularly in you’re life you’ve probably felt like skipping a day at some point.  And you probably have skipped days.

But what’s interesting is that if you can convince yourself to run that first mile or lift the first set you almost always feel motivated to do more.

But what if it doesn’t motivate me?  Although I’ve found that the above strategy motivates me the majority of the time, sometimes it doesn’t.

In the past I’ve used will power to push myself through those workouts and I still do occasionally, but that’s not always necessary.

I’ve found that often the reason I can’t motivate myself to workout is because I’m already overworking my muscles and they need a chance to recover.

Some days it’s in my best interest to allow my body to recover instead of risking injury.  Realize, however, that there’s a fine line between resting because your body needs to recover and using lack of motivation as an excuse to skip a workout.

This analogy can also be applied to almost anything else as well.  Don’t wait until you’re motivated to start a blog.  You can have one online within an hour.  Don’t wait until you feel motivated to leave your job.  Two words is all it takes. (I quit)

You’ll never accomplish anything meaningful if you wait until you feel motivated to start taking action.  Take initiative today.  One step is all it takes.  The rest will fall into place.

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Problems Aren’t Bad

A common misperception people have is that problems are bad.  That couldn’t be any further from the truth.

For one, we have the appreciation factor.  How are you supposed to appreciate good health if you’ve never been sick?  Wealth if you’ve never been poor?  Love if you’ve never been alone?

Most people in the United States and other developed nations know on an intellectual level that people are starving in Africa.  But they’ve never experienced scarcity so they can’t appreciate abundance.

When I hear religious people talk about “Heaven” it makes me sick.  I don’t think faith is a bad thing, but I can’t help but feel nauseous when I hear about a magical place in the sky where problems don’t exist.

Do you understand how boring that would be?  I sure wouldn’t want to live there.

Another great thing about problems is they provide feedback.  They let us know when something went wrong so we can work to fix it.

You feel pain when you stub your toe as a protective mechanism to prevent you from further injuring yourself.  In the same way problems exist to deter us from making future poor decisions.

When you begin to understand the true nature of problems you’ll learn to love them.

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Complaining is one of the worst habits you could possibly have.  Even the most positive people complain on occasion, but most people complain waaay too much.

I’m not going to complain about complainers because that would only contribute to the negativity, but realize all complaining does is contribute to feelings of discontent and helplessness.

Complaining about how you’re fat, lonely, and depressed does nothing to solve the problem, if anything it makes it worse.

By complaining you’re giving your power away.  By complaining you’re telling the universe that you’re not ready to take responsibility for your life.

Another negative effect of complaining is that you’ll attract more negativity into your life, potentially spiraling yourself into a whole negative cycle.

Consistent complaining is one of the main reason depressed people find it so difficult to find any happiness in life.

They’ve spent so much time complaining that they’ve manifested a reality that matches their negative thoughts, and because they’ve conditioned themselves to think so negatively, they can’t even appreciate any remaining remnants of positivity left in their lives.

For the most part people complain because they’re afraid to take responsibility for their lives, but once they begin to hold themselves accountable they’ll be a lot happier.

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Irrational Fears

I find fear very interesting.  On one hand it’s helped ensure the survival of the human race as we’ve evolved, but in modern times it’s often used as an excuse to justify not pursuing what we really want.

Don’t get me wrong, if I’m in the jungle getting chased by a lion I want to have my adrenaline pumping and be scared out of my mind.  I think survival fear for the most part is a good thing.

That’s not the fear I’m talking about.  I’m talking about fear of success, fear of public speaking, fear of not being good enough.  I’m talking about fears that have no rational basis in reality.

I first had the idea of starting a personal development blog almost two years ago.

I had hit rock bottom in my life a few months prior, and as I became more interested in personal development I felt extremely motivated to share my experiences and insights to help other people grow.

I was so motivated I did absolutely nothing.  For two whole years.  Why?  Irrational fears.  What if my friends think I’m nerdy?  What if they make fun of me?  What if people think I’m not cool?

For anyone truly growth oriented those are pathetic excuses.  So what if your friends think you’re nerdy or they make fun of you?

You should be grateful for the opportunity to eliminate those people from your life.  Better to get rid of them now than later.  You won’t have truly fulfilling relationships until you can let go of the people who won’t accept you for what you are.

As I continued my journey of personal growth I began to worry less about others opinions, but I continued to make irrational justifications for why I shouldn’t blog.

The biggest one was that I had no way to self-host or get a custom domain.  How was I supposed to look professional blogging at cameronchardukian.wordpress.com instead of cameronchardukian.com?

Obviously I’d still prefer to blog at cameronchardukian.com but using that as an excuse to not blog at all would be stupid.  Even if I’m not blogging under ideal circumstances it’s still infinitely better than doing nothing.

There’s this strange human instinct that tells us that everything has to be all or nothing.  While I don’t encourage settling, wouldn’t you rather get something instead of nothing?

People have this tendency to make every little excuse or justification but they’d get infinitely better results just facing their fears.

If you want to quit your job quit.  If you want to lose weight start exercising.  If you want to speak a foreign language start learning today.

You are good enough.  You are smart enough.  But if you want the results you need to face your fears.

The time will never be right until you make it the right time.

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Why I Love Everyone

There’s not a single person I hate.  Is that strange? I’m sure to most people it may seem so, and I definitely would have said the same of this mindset a couple years ago.  Now, however, I see it as the only logical outlook on life.

I’ve found that the main reason many people sink to the level of hatred is because of a lack of understanding.  Few people understand that not a single person wants to be hated.

Nobody wants to be the bad guy.  Nobody wants to be the person with no friends.  Nobody wants to feel alone and unloved.

The actions of some may give off this impression but truthfully nobody wants to live like that.  When we seek to understand the perspective of others instead of judging them we develop a greater understanding for why they act in the manner they do.

One of the more common beliefs these people hold is that they aren’t good enough.  I held this belief for a number of years myself and with this belief came the feeling that nobody could love me for who I am.

Since then I’ve come to terms with myself, but I haven’t forgotten where I came from.  I still remember what it’s like to feel inadequate.

People don’t wake up in the morning consciously plotting to ruin others days.   They do it because subconsciously they believe that’s the only way anyone will pay any attention to them.

Deep down everyone has a good heart. Everybody wants to be loved. Some people may be misguided, but none of them are evil.

Don’t judge, seek to understand and love everyone.

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First Post

I just got the blog up and running.  I plan on using this blog to write about various topics within the field of personal development.  Stay tuned for some interesting posts in the next few days.

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